1 Mother 2 Another

Brian and I had a night away this past
weekend to celebrate his upcoming birthday, and here’s the
sad truth: we waved goodbye to the kids around 5:30, hopped in the
car, had a quick bite to eat, checked in around 8:30, and then
changed into our jammies, climbed in bed, and gleefully watched
television.


That was our big night.


Yes, gone are the days of excitement and glamour: a Night Away now
takes on a very different flavor. As I pondered this change, I
began compiling a mental list of what now constitutes, to me, true
pampering and luxury. Forget your lavish mani-pedis or six-hour
bubble baths; give me a solid day filled with items from this list,
and I’ll be a grateful puddle on the floor.


I humbly submit it for your approval.

Eating a meal in one sitting.
Without getting up. At all.


Only cutting up one person’s food – your own.


Reading a whole chapter of a book at once. At a time other
than two a.m.


Going a whole day without singing any Disney songs. Any.


Choosing a restaurant that, while it may not be super-fancy,
does not have a basket full of placemat-wrapped crayons at the
hostess stand.


Eating candy in the open. And not having to share it. No
more sneaking behind the pantry door to get a quick bite of that
cookie you started two days ago – just sit right down and eat
the whole thing and not get up until it’s finished (see
“eating a meal in one sitting”).


Spending an entire day without playing Candy Land. Methinks
that would be heaven.


And finally, my idea of Utopia would HAVE to include:


Going to the bathroom all by yourself. Yep, this is top of
the list. You’re out in public, you need to pee, and you go
into a stall ALL BY YOURSELF – and you don’t even have
to wait for the family-sized one! No one’s looking at your
hiney to see “what’s coming out”, no one’s
sniffing the floor to “figure out what that purple thing
is”, no one’s rating the effectiveness of your wiping
yourself with the brutality of an East German Olympic judge. This
is pure heaven.


I hear.


So that’s my humble start – what’s at the top of
your list?