The Go-To Girlfriend for New Mommies
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Is it wrong of me to want Madeleine to go a little slower in the development department?
None of us ever think we’ll be one of those parents: the ones who push their kids developmentally, play language tapes while the baby sleeps, and brag to everyone that little Johnny put his toes in his mouth a full two weeks before the books predicted he would. But I’ll confess, I read ahead in my parenting books on what to expect in the coming months, then I hover anxiously to see these miracles happen, maybe even verbally coax her to try to help her out. Ok, maybe say things like, “Can you roll over for mommy? All the other babies are doing it!” I know that if she’s more than a couple weeks off of the experts’ estimates for any stage – binocular gazing, grasping, holding her head up, whatever – I’ll start to panic and pressure her. And what baby needs that kind of pressure?My first birthday as a mother. Here’s what I did:
I slept late. I got up and ate pancakes. I took a long hot bath.
Then I woke up.
Every mother knows the importance of a good schedule for her baby.
I’m not talking about sleep training or scheduled feedings; we’re setting those hot-button topics aside. I’m simply talking about a predictable routine for each day, so your baby has an idea of what’s coming next: walks, naps, playtime, and so forth, all happening in roughly the same order. I’ve found this makes Madeleine much less anxious (and keeps me from watching the clock with a “Dear God, how will I fill the rest of the day?” sort of attitude). Every morning when she wakes, we have our dressing routine complete with songs and stories, breakfast, and then our walk for the day. We’ve been walking every day since she was three weeks old, partly because she loves the stimulation and partly because Mommy needs to get out of the house.Yesterday, Madeleine took two steps away from me.
Not physical steps; she didn’t magically stand up and walk on her 4 1/2-month-old legs. But she began her journey to independence from me in two very real ways:Josh, my girlfriend Abby’s newest babe, has officially hit two weeks old, and while Abby seems to have gotten off remarkably easy emotion-wise – no real heavy post-partum blues – she is definitely experiencing post- post-partum-doula blues.
Anybody know any private security firms that specialize in stroller walks?
Madeleine’s been so alert and interested in her surroundings recently that she’s imitating an owl, twisting her head as far around in a perfect circle as she can go while I’m wearing her in the Bjorn. So I thought it might be time to crack open the “big girl” stroller, our forward-facing Maclaren.Pacifier or thumb; the age-old debate never ends. Unfortunately (or fortunately), many times the child decides for herself.
Brian and I originally decided to try for the pacifier; we reasoned it would be easier for us to control, and help her to use it for comfort rather than habit. When Madeleine was just a few weeks old, it became clear she occasionally needed to comfort suck at not always workable times, and my finger just wasn’t cutting it. We tried several different brands and types of pacifier, and she would have none of them.
I’d like to talk about the country all parents dread; the place no one will admit to visiting but where all strangers seem to be from – the Land of Uninvited Opinions.
When I was pregnant, I felt as if the sign around my neck reading, “Please tell me your birth story” was dwarfed only by the one hanging over my expanded rear proclaiming, “Please comment on the way my body looks.” Here’s a sampling of actual comments by actual acquaintances (though obviously, not good friends!):
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